sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
