I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize