Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
