She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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