they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
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After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
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Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
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