After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
