she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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