i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize