Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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