New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
