They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
