: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
