Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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