Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
