I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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