yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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