Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Drunk is not a location!
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
