Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
he shaved USA in his pubs
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize