I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
This house was built for laser tag.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
