Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Randomize
