Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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