Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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