Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
