what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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