Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
