I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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