She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
