Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
