Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize