My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
