maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
