Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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