I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
