I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
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