Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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