how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
