the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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