Texts From Last Night

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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.

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  (610): We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other. http://tfl.nu/212r
  Replies (19) Good night (2015) Bad night (3214)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.

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  (419): Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them. http://tfl.nu/vhc8
  Replies (42) Good night (5976) Bad night (579)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..

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  (432): So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone.. http://tfl.nu/o0ep
  Replies (18) Good night (677) Bad night (4335)
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  (805): View more from California

  im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking

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  (805): im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking http://tfl.nu/diqd
  Replies (26) Good night (4350) Bad night (753)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.

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  (318): Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity. http://tfl.nu/izk8
  Replies (66) Good night (572) Bad night (4735)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?

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  (402): Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy? http://tfl.nu/i95d
  Replies (276) Good night (4241) Bad night (27066)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.

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  (914): at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors. http://tfl.nu/h61j
  Replies (5) Good night (3604) Bad night (1089)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.

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  (814): He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well. http://tfl.nu/fer2
  Replies (13) Good night (2490) Bad night (3974)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.

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  (724): He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever. http://tfl.nu/8ol6
  Replies (6) Good night (3376) Bad night (718)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably

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  (626): yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably http://tfl.nu/rjum
  Replies (9) Good night (607) Bad night (2091)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.

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  (610): I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life. http://tfl.nu/8k8d
  Replies (7) Good night (779) Bad night (897)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.

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  (443): well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud. http://tfl.nu/je7g
  Replies (2) Good night (1699) Bad night (676)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.

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  (402): No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn. http://tfl.nu/c09n
  Replies (1) Good night (270) Bad night (536)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman

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  (+44): Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman http://tfl.nu/09hv
  Replies (1) Good night (811) Bad night (216)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.

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  (805): I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled. http://tfl.nu/0c1d
  Replies (3) Good night (542) Bad night (281)

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