I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.