are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
