How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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