The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize