youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
