I must be too annoying 4 u.
Having a random hookup so left but love u
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
