I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
