I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
