we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
