I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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