she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize