her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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