I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize