We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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