My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
you never un-have a 4some
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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