I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
